-Why star actress married secretly
-7 ways she can keep her man
The Wednesday, August 24, 2016, second marriage of Funke Akindele, 39, with Abdul Rasheed Bello, also 39, in London (United Kingdom) stands a better chance of survival on many fronts.
In spite of her painful separation from Kehinde Almaroof Oloyede barely a year after their May 26, 2012, wedding, this second time around, the star actress has many things in her favour to ensure that she spends the rest of her life in the arms of her music producer and rapper husband.
For one, less people divorce in their second union! With 45% of first marriages collapsing, only 31% of second marriages fail. And this study of couples in the United States of America gladdens the hearts of her adoring fans.
What’s more, a second union of two very matured people throws up the opportunity of far more happiness and enjoyment.
ENCOMIUM Weekly examines the ways a serious woman in a second marriage, like Funke Akindele, can make it work and last a lifetime:
- Make the home comfortable, inviting and peaceful
A comfortable home, with beautiful furniture and furnishing, is one of the starting points of a lasting union. Once the home is appealing, the next step is to keep it tidy and neat, and make the objects assembled there enhance a more enjoyable and functional life.
The second step is to study the habits of ABDUL Rasheed Bello, and line in his path everyday what makes him happier. From hot meals at appropriate times to the drinks he fancies.
The home should be a refuge, a haven of peace, where all the troubles and challenges of everyday living are put in perspective and better managed. Friction and irritating activities should be jettisoned.
The man should be proud of his abode once it is made more beautiful, more comfortable, inviting and peaceful by his wife.
- Understand the mechanics of being a step mother
Being a step mother to four children will be very challenging. For one, the children are almost becoming adults and they live in London. So, they will have their own idiosyncrasies that an African mother will find inexplicable.
She cannot take the role of their mother. She should not even attempt it. At best, she can be an older friend who is understanding and tolerant. And treats them well.
Never try to come between them and their father. Or antagonize their mother. If possible, if the mothers are tolerable, they can be friends.
- Know the place of fame, never compete
Right now, Funke Akindele is enjoying more fame and fortune. And it should never get into her head. Acting as the bigger star will create more friction and lead to constant quarrel.
Sustaining a celebrity marriage is twice as difficult as a normal wedlock. With larger than life egos, celebrities are complex creatures. And with two in a union, their situation is precarious. They need to drop fame at their doorstep, before they enter their home.
They should find ways of complementing each other and encouraging their careers.
- Accept the husband as the leader, the captain
No matter how blessed or more famous than her husband, he is still the leader, the captain of their ship.
Whether she has more money, better respected or famous, the man leads. A man is positioned to be the captain, and once that position is challenged, threatened or conceded, the union is jeopardized.
So, she should allow him ‘wear the trousers’.
And he should also struggle to be the breadwinner so that he can earn the respect of his spouse. He must provide for the family and take charge.
- Keep in shape and give him all the sex he needs
What was the object of attraction? Some of it has to do with how she looks. So, she must not now abandon her beauty regimen and become lazy. She must look more beautiful, dress better, decently and neater.
And give him all the sex he needs. Or, he will look for it elsewhere.
Once their sexual prowess and interest are at variance, there will be problems.
- Don’t let anyone or anything come between you
This is not the time to elevate anyone above your husband. Whether family or friends. Your first family is your husband.
Keeping friends whose intentions are suspect should not be entertained. Only keep the company of matured, trust worthy friends who are good natured and will watch your back.
You need time to bond with and know your husband.
- Create ample time for romance and communicate
What comes first? A happy home with a loving and understanding spouse! And how can this be achieved? By creating ample time for each other, by communicating both verbally and physically. By learning about each other and deepening their romance.
They should constantly create time out of their punishing schedule.
But making a marriage work is the duty of both parties. Abdul Rasheed Bello has the responsibility of being the man, and he should lead and make this union last their lifetime.