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‘I have not quit acting’ -Alexandra Okoroji

Actress Alex Okoroji has not been seen in the acting world for some time now, and the lovely Nollywood diva has explained her absence.

She revealed that she has been acting, taking care of her child and dealing with depression at the same time.

However, during a short interview with ENCOMIUM Weekly, she revealed that some people have been unfair to her, telling producers that she no longer works and has quit. And she has a word of the wise for these rumour mongers…

alex okoroji 3What has been happening to you, you disappeared from the scene after having your son?

I didn’t disappear. I simply expanded my family and took some time off to raise my child.

Despite the fact that you are back to the industry, we are not yet feeling your impact like before, why?

Feeling my impact. That would be socially relative. Maybe as an actress, you’re right. There are new talents on the block that came in when I took a brief hiatus. But as a creative artist, trust me, I’ve been working and influencing my creative community quietly. I did three or four movies last year that strangely haven’t been released and of course that tends to give the impression one isn’t working unless one is busy courting unnecessary media attention. Yes, I haven’t been out in the media like I used to be and I stayed away from events and granting interviews. But I’m back, strong and ready to earn my place.

What are you working on presently?

I’m working on so many things, to be honest. I seem to have mentally invested my mind in several creative projects. I’m back to working a lot as an actress, just got off a movie production with Stride Media, I’ve been recording voiceovers for radio, I’m finalizing prep for a radio show I’m collaborating with two of my established colleagues in Nollywood. I’ve become socially vocal and pro-active especially with the Think-Tank 4 New Lagos (#4NL) and I now author my own personal blog Alexandra n’ her naked thoughts where I share my unfiltered musings about inspiration, love, life, sex and reality. Meanwhile, the positive feedback I’m getting from creating/designing the entire blog/content all by myself using just a blackberry mobile phone has been one of the most rewarding challenges of my life.

What will you say you missed while absent from Nollywood?

I’ve missed a lot actually. That is my first love and it used to be my everyday life. Now, my life as culminated into bigger deeper things. Yet I still love being in front of the camera, it gives me a medium to express and communicate. And just the general joy of being in the presence of crazy artists like myself.

377_34271668298_9370_nAside acting and blogging, what else put food on your table?

Creativity is the only thing that puts food on my table. That’s why I laugh when some people say I’ve left the industry. How? A true artist never leaves his craft. I live by the arts. If I am not acting, I am writing screen plays for movies, TV, songs, editorials and so on. You probably hear my voice on some of your favourite radio adverts, and may not even know it’s me. I’m still presenting TV programmes and hosting a couple of red carpet events. I mean, I was the official AMAA Red Carpet hostess in 2012, with Soundcity’s VJ Adams. I did my job and took off a few minutes into the main event. I had to go home to my baby and that eight inches heel almost broke my back. I’ve been involved with the media production of several top events. As an actress, writer, TV presenter, voiceover artiste, mistress of ceremonies and now a blog author, it’s difficult to stay idle with my kind of portfolio. I am a true artist through and through.

How is motherhood treating you?

Motherhood is treating me well. I have matured. At first it was a rapid change that affected me deeply. I mean I am happy to be the mother of one of the most adorable children you can ever know. But the initial switch was a little confusing and overwhelming. And it sort of depressed me.

What is the best thing about being a mother?

Motherhood is beautiful in so many ways. I talked about it in one of Alex’s audio diary on my blog. The fact that you have a part of yourself who is dependent on you for everything including affection, and it’s your responsibility to guide them and build them…yet they teach you how to truly love. Have you ever tried changing diapers in the middle of the night when you badly want to sleep or have vomit all over your Versace at a public function? It takes genuine love not to dump that baby in a trash can even if it’s for just a second.

How old is your son now?

My son turned four on May 12. Please, do you know any hot baby chicks we can hook him up with? I need a daughter in-law sharply.

alex okoroji 5You mentioned on social media that you were treating depression. What exactly happened, why were you depressed?

Okay, I wasn’t medically diagnosed for depression but I didn’t need anyone to tell me what was up with my body. Depression is real and people experience it every day. I was completely depressed. I put on quite a bit of weight from my pre-baby body. In fact, I was still hot and sexy till I turned seven months, and after my cesarean delivery, my bra size grew twice bigger.  My BP was high (before that, I had never had a surgery, nor a fracture or a dentist appointment) and my first child birth experience was a surgery I wasn’t mentally prepared for. I couldn’t tie my tummy or heal like other mothers do. My stitches were taking time to heal and I couldn’t exercise. I didn’t have the zeal to work, I couldn’t sleep at night. My insomnia became worse, I started having toothaches and reading problems. I was binging (emotionally eating), and all sorts of rumours were flying around. Even after I moved back from Ghana, I just didn’t know how to reconnect with my old contacts/colleagues and get back in the game, knowing full well that as an entertainer, your mind might be your workshop but the body is your tool.

How were you able to overcome it?

Prayer, reading, writing, exercising, a few good friends and having a good family as your support system. Truth is, I had to recognise what was holding me back and moved against it. I had to be my own hero and save myself. Writing, for me, is therapeutic. I unleash all the demons. Strangely I hide behind my pen, all the things I may not say out for respect to other people’s sensitivity. I write it out. People get shocked when they read what I write, even if the subject is sex or just my random thoughts. It’s not the same picture of the sweet high-spirited Alex they know.

Any regret that the relationship between you and your son’s father did not work?

No regret, only lessons.

What are the lessons learnt from the experience?

The lessons are personal, but I will say I learned to trust and respect my instincts better. I’ve also learned ‘love’ is a choice and most of all the realities of relationships and marriages are way deeper than our fickle minds can understand.

alex okoroji 2What is the relationship between you and your ex?

This is where I go no comment. The truth is, I wish him well. My heart is too big for anger. It’s important for people to understand that just because a marriage is broken doesn’t mean the family should be broken too. Hopefully, some people will one day learn marriage isn’t the only criteria to stay connected to their blood.

Is he responsible for his upkeep?

If I go no comment, who would I be fooling? One of my core responsibilities as a public figure is to tell my truth to inspire others and stand up against ignorance. We hate honesty in this country, but I’ve been teaching myself to speak the truth even if my voice shakes. I have been raising my child all by myself for the last three years plus. And it’s okay. I’m alive, well and able bodied. It’s not a big deal that I should fend for my own blood. The process has made me stronger than I can imagine. And for any woman who’s going through the same, you are stronger than you give yourself credit.

Your ex had some controversy back then, it was said that he had another relationship that produced a kid. Will you say that contributed to the factor that affected your relationship?

That’s his controversy. It’s not my place to speak on that.

Do you think it will be difficult to find Mr. Right again?

Again? If I found Mr. Right before, wouldn’t we still be together, right? I don’t think it will be difficult. There are lots of good men out there. What would be difficult is finding the right combination of a kind heart, a generous spirit and an intellectual mind.

alex okorojiWhat kind of man appeals to you now?

I’m a sucker for good looking and intelligent men, I can’t lie. But most important, someone I can connect with on a spiritual level. I don’t play with my God. I may be quiet about faith because I’m not a hypocrite. But I know I would never have endured the things I’ve experienced if there was no God. He has been my rock and I want a man who has submitted his heart to God, that’s the only kind I can give my heart.

We learnt you are daddy’s pet and also close to your mom, how supportive have they been?

Really? Me and this my daddy sef. People keep comparing us. Anyway, we get along very well. We connect on a creative wave length and we also share some similar ideology about life. My mom is a very strong woman and I think I took that from her. They are both extremely hard working and passionate. It’s no surprise I work as hard as I do. They have been very supportive, especially my mother. Honestly, there’s nothing more beautiful than when family become friends. They are both my very good friends.

– DOLAPO AMODENI

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