COME Saturday, October 24, 2015, relationship expert and CEO, Optimal Performance Limited, Olubukola Adefope will be staging a seminar entitled, Relationship Essentials, in Abeokuta, Ogun State. The eye opener event is expected to draw participants from within and outside the state.
ENCOMIUM Weekly took the University of Lagos graduate of Philosophy on this and much more when we visited her in her Anthony Village, Lagos office on Wednesday, September 30, 2015.
What brought about the concept, Optimal Performance?
We understand the fact that everyone cannot be the best or first but it can be just right for you. So, what has brought about Optimal Performance is that we want people to perform at their best, at what’s best for them because we don’t have the same strengths and weaknesses. But the individuals are able to access what’s best for them and perform at their best, realizing what’s uniquely them and play on those unique strengths to bring about the very best of them. We also engage individuals to live with little or no regret. And when we’re performing at our best every time, it’s possible to get the very best of ourselves once we know what that best is and we run with it. So, at the end of life, we’re able to look back and say yes, we have run the race, we have fought a good fight, and victory is certain. And so, we leave knowing that we have lived a fulfilled life, a life of purpose and we’re happy. And of course, we go to the grave empty, meaning that we have been able to achieve the purpose for which we’re created. And that, for us, is what translates to living a fulfilled life.
What’s the mission statement of the organization?
Our mission is to support everyone that comes in contact with us, to live better than what such a person would have been if he hadn’t come in contact with us. So, we support every individual and organization to live the best life having come in contact with us.
When was Optimal Performance Limited established?
This is our third year. That means it was established in 2012. And that’s when it was incorporated with the Corporate Affairs Commission (CAC). We had our inaugural lecture on October 6, 2012.
Since that time, what has been the experience so far?
It has been really rewarding though slow because in our society, we find a lot of imbalances. We find people who are committed to one area of life. If it’s a career someone has focused on, you find out that such a person will be very successful with his or her career. But other areas are lacking, and so we engage people to have a balanced perspective of every area of life. The message initially didn’t sink, but when people began to get exposed to the content of our discourse and began to see the challenges they have seen clearer, they are now able to identify with precision what area of their lives they need to improve to be able to get a balanced engagement of all areas of their lives. And so, business wise, in terms of naira and kobo, it has been a bit slow. But in terms of personal transformation that has taken place with the few people we have been able to affect, I must say it has been rewarding. And if that’s’ our definition of success, then it’s been successful. And I must tell you, I am personally happy and fulfilled. And I look forward to getting in contact with more people.
What have been the challenges so far?
Just like I said, the perception these days and age is that we’re so focused on the superficial. Our focus on the superficial in this part of the world, I must say, is legendary. And we sweep a lot of issues under the carpet, including the ones concerning psychological trauma, torture, lack of success and others just to appear successful and happy and a lot is going on behind the scene. A lot of under performance is taking place at work with the relationship spiritually, mentally, psychologically, and we see that people are not just in touch with who they are, not in touch with their personal essence. And so there is a lot of copying.
People are copying others, wanting to appear like them. People can’t be original any more. People don’t even think. And then of course, education is perceived as certificate. Once we say someone has a certificate, we assume that he or she is successful. But once people open their mouths, you begin to wonder where the certificates are from. And so, the challenge really is the public perception. Our concept of success is a major challenge because we are vain in that the hood makes the monk and we all know that the hood doesn’t make the monk. And so, we’re emphasizing designer clothes, we’re emphasizing materialism, and very little attention is placed on the search for wisdom, on the connection with personal essence and with taking positive action because we see a lot of people talking about what they want to do, what they are going to do. And it’s very easy to build a skyscraper with our mouth, but taking action is a major challenge.
Of course, coaching is about taking a major action. And so, we see a lot of people whose major challenge we have faced as an organization.
That means people lack application of the full knowledge they acquired while in school or training?
Yes, we see a lot of knowledgeable people who lack wisdom and that’s the major challenge.
Where do we see the Optimal Performance in few years?
In few years, I see us driving this information because it’s key to everything we’re going to do. We need buy-in, psychological buy-in from the vast majority of people. So, I see us working hard in the area of driving this idea for people to begin to take action towards personal transformation. Once you’re able to drive this information and people begin to see the importance of taking action, then I see us affecting many lives because really, we’re only truly happy as individuals when we’re able to make positive change and affect positively anybody that comes in contact with us. So, I see us working very hard to drive this point.
As a beauty of having this paradigm shift, it can be two or 10 minutes but once your perception changes from a grabbling society to a creating one just like the Asians, then this country will be a paradise on its own. And so, I see us with the right people to move with and then with, of course, the assistance of government because if the government is able to understand this from the top, then we’re moving forward. Just as it’s rightly said, when the head is good, the whole of the body is good. So, once the government takes this in and begins to drive this information as well by any means necessary and people begin to understand it and attain that paradigm. Then, I see us being a successful organization in few years.
Come Saturday, October 24, 2015, you will be organizing a seminar in Abeokuta, Ogun State, entitled Relationship Essentials. What is it all about?
Relationship Essentials is a life changing seminar. I noticed one thing, when we talk about relationship, many people think we’re talking about marriage, courtship or finding the right partner. They’re partly right but what we want people to understand is that relationship begins with you. What’s the level of relationship you have with yourself. That is the point we are talking about, self-esteem. As the truth is, no one is ever going to treat you better than you treat yourself. As you want people to begin to look inward, when you want a good friend. Are you a friend? When you want to define a friend, can you be your own best friend? You know all information about yourself. Is it possible that when you want to choose a best friend, can you choose you? And usually, when people reflect upon that question, the answer is always no because about 90 per cent of people, in every activity they choose, there is always an ulterior motive. There is a fraud behind every smile. There is a wicked purpose behind every gesture. When you see a nice person, usually you’re supposed to warm up but sometimes, 90 per cent of the time, when I see a ‘nice person’ I run away. What’s the motive?
Examine your motive so that when you have any problem in your relationship, you begin to examine your own motive. When you deal with people with a negative motive, that motive will come back to hunt you.
So, what you have in mind determines the quality of the relationship you’re going to have. Then when we’re talking about relationship, first, we’re talking about relationship with God, that’s spirituality, relationship with yourself, which is self-esteem; relationship with your clients as well as your staff and service providers, that’s business. When we talk about relationship with money, we’re talking about wealth or poverty. And finally, when we are talking about relationship with our social life, we mean our relationship with people around us – siblings, neighbours and everybody around you. So, the word relationship has a broader look, and we’re going to be taking it from a broader perspective. And we want to say, the quality of the relationship with yourself will determine every other relationship.
And of course, when you see yourself, how you treat yourself that is going to determine how you treat God that you don’t see. So, all of these things come together to make for the quality of life that you live. We now want to say that relationships are pivotal to human existence because human is an island. And you can imagine an island that’s divided against itself. It’s a war zone. And so, for many people, they live their lives throughout with internal conflicts, confused about who they are, what their values are, what their beliefs are. And of course, this is also going to affect marriages. And singles what sort of man or woman shouldn’t you allow near you. They will have an insight to all of these because whatever it is, it’s going to affect the quality of your life. So, the earlier you have all these information, the better for you to determine the quality of life you’re going to live. So, it’s a must come.
It’s a seminar that people should not for any reason miss. There are some women that are telling me, oh it’s my cousin’s wedding day and things like that. And sometimes I smile because you may be going out and felicitate with people that are about to leap into a lake of fire called wrong marriage. So, you are part of the crowd. You also are already confused in your lake of fire. And you now go again to encourage someone that has taken a wrong step, two, three weeks down the lane these marriages collapse because they lack foundation and it’s because they lack the information they should have. So, I would advise anyone planning to get married or planning to start a relationship or even planning to end one to come attend this seminar.
- TADE ASIFAT